You Heard it Here: The Twins Are Going All the Way

What a great weekend. I spent most of it compiling more proof that I lead a preposterously charmed life--Friday night: I scored two free tix to see Brian Jonestown Massacre/Tapes 'n Tapes show on May 7; Saturday: a 4-hour midday nap and a great Clap Your Hands Say Yeah show that night at the 400 Bar; Sunday: Saw T-Wolves OT win against the Golden State Warriors (Marcus Banks was on fire) with three of my brothers and then incredible, comfort food-filled Sunday night dinner at Dad & Stepmom's.

Nevertheless, there is a more pressing matter at hand: Twins baseball begins tomorrow.

This year, we are going all the way. You heard it here.

The sunny beginning, the proverbial clean slate, should always be a time for wildly optimisitc predictions and passionate, irrational partisianship. I will not take this moment to get all Ken Burnsy on you and rhapsodize about spring and baseball and the ubiquitous theme of renewal (Don't you notice how all that stuff sounds like a stoned hippie girl trying to write like Lorca? "The spring! The dewy grass! The pristine virgin baseball diamond! I hope! I hope!"), but if you call yourself a true Twins fan, you should believe that you will be waving your Homer Hankie and spraying celebratory Primos all over your friends and family when the Twins win it all in October.

I'm calling you out, Star Tribune! I'm calling you out, Mpls-St. Paul Magazine! Both of you predicted a third place finish in the AL Central? With a "maybe" for contending for the AL wild card? What's wrong with you? These feeble prognostications of mediocrity for our beloved squad will not stand! And don't try and shield yourselves behind some dubious explanation
of "objective journalism." You should know where your bread is buttered.

Take it from Murray Chass. A real journalist from a real paper. He knows the score:
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/04/02/sports/baseball/02alcentral.html?_r=1&oref=slogin

The road to Title Town begins tomorrow night in Toronto. See you there in October.